Oct13

Carpe Sceam Day 12

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Tonight I took a look at The Blair Witch Project.

The Blair Witch Project, 1999 Artisan Entertainment

I remember this coming out when I was in High School. The hype behind it was as subtle as this:

Movie studios don’t lie, do they?

The movie studios plugged this as hard as they could as a genuine documentary filmed by three dead people. They even went as far as to pay IMDB to list their credits as (missing: presumed dead).

And I think almost every high school student in the United States fell for it. I mean, with camera footage this crappy, with really bad sound and editing and obviously no real dialogue, what else could it be? A REAL studio wouldn’t release this motion-sickness inducing home video, right??  And really that’s why it was deemed to be one of the scariest horror movie of all time.

But the minute you realize that this was all a “plausible” hoax filmed in a public park with 2 handheld cameras (they had to stop filming every time families on their bikes road by), it really takes the wind out of the Blair Witch’s sail. Every vomit-inducing quick pan. Every sound blip, every time they TALK ABOUT THE F*** MAP…

(NSFW Language)

it just makes me really kind of angry at the studio for being the unholy mother chosen by Satan to give birth to all the found footage movies that are saturating the horror-movie genre right now: rollercoaster rides full of clunky dialogue and NOTHING HAPPENING.

Paranormal Activity 6: The Ghost Dimensions? Yeah. THANKS Blair Witch.

Go stand in the corner!!

Oct12

Inktober Day 11

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I’ve had the song “Katrina” from Disney’s Legend of Sleepy Hollow stuck in my head, so I felt compelled to sketch this really quick (about 10 minutes).

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Disney’s Katrina Van Tassel

Here’s the song, if you hadn’t heard it. It’s a great short too. (copyright Disney 1949)

Oct12

Carpe Scream Day 11

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Today, I watched a classic Monster B-Movie, that wins the best movie song award: The Blob (1958)

Super Groovy.

This one features Steeve McQueen as a “young teen” that rallies a town to defend itself from an interstellar parasite that devours and absorbs flesh.

17 going on 28.

As far as movies go, this one certainly has a more sophisticated, compellingly written and well shot production quality, and is just plain entertaining. I love the cast, the varied characters, the real struggle of the teens fighting for their town and the people who eventually help champion them. My only complaint is that the pacing can get a bit slow in places.

It’s also not afraid to laugh at itself, which any horror movie should be if it can help it.

I think there’s some requirement that all 50’s SciFi movies contain a character named “Steve.”

I remember seeing this one when I was younger, and finding the blob pretty terrifying. I mean, it “dissolves” you. How horrible is that?

It also makes a great marinade.

As a parting gift I leave you with The Blob drinking game:

Every time someone says “Steve,” take a drink. Don’t die.

Oct11

Carpe Scream Day 10

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Today, I watch a classic Corman Film, Edgar Allen Poe’s the Haunted Palace.

The Haunted Palace, 1963 American International Pictures

Well one thing this movie does NOT have is anything by Edgar Allen Poe save one poem at the end. This movie is almost 100% H. P. Lovecraft’s “The Case of Charles Dexter Ward.” In interviews,Corman stated that he was very much a Lovecraft fan, but no studio wanted to produce a story a story by this “unheard of schlock writer.” That’s when it was decided to rename this picture, “The Haunted Palace,” and claim it was based on a poem by Edgar Allen Poe, seeding the “castle” angle throughout the movie. After all, Corman had already made several well-received Poe pictures with Vincent Price, so why not?

Pictured: Zero Ravens.

That being said, this is actually one of the strongest movie’s Corman’s ever directed. The pacing is better than your usual Corman, the story is well presented and visually interesting. Price’s performance is, as always, very entertaining, and the final sequence is satisfying and nicely grim.

GO PATS!

This is a jewel of classic B-Movies, and definitely worth a watch.

Oct10

Inktober Day 9

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Here’s my Inktober for Day 9. I put a shoutout for ideas, and my friend Barrie requested to see Linus in a school uniform. I’m sure she meant something along the lines of cramming 52-year-old Linus into a Japanese boys school uniform, but I did her one better. Here is a young Linus (about 19) in the official Uniform of the Rangers Union Pre-One student.

He looks like he’s on the way to archery practice, and doesnt’ care if his hair is combed or his jacket is hooked up. He has three leaves on his shoulder indicating that this is his third year as a student (students take 4 years to complete courses). His jacket also Features the triple-leaf emblem of the Rangers Union on his chest. The drawing needs some tweaking, but I like details that I came up with on the fly that add a little more to Linus’s story.

Hope you like it, Barrie.

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Linus Pre-One, by Monica Marier, pen and ink

Oct9

Carpe Scream Day 9

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Today I’m watching a Clive Barker classic,

Hellraiser, 1987, New World Pictures

I actually did some research on this, and I laughed so hard when I found out that one of crew lovingly subtitled this movie, “What a woman would do for a good f***.” It’s not surprising that this particular cast member was a sweet little old lady. And she wasn’t wrong, because that more or less sums up the plot.

Clive Barker’s bloody, gooey, gross, gruesome, masterpiece, is both funny, and creepy and as “out there” as it gets, with a creepy-ass soundtrack and fantastic makeup designs. Another fun fact: All 4 of the Cenobites were supposed to be equals with no leader among them but 2 of the Cenobites, “Butterball” and “Chattering” had so many prosthetics that they couldn’t say their lines. Their extra lines were given to “Pinhead” which made him the unofficial “leader” of the Cenobites.

I think I threw away my retainer! Can you guys help me look for it?

NOT for the faint of heart, but great if you’re in a bloodthirsty mood and want to see some really creative makeup jobs.

Oct9

Carpe Scream Day 8

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Day 8 is here, and I’m dipping back into the retro vault for some old-fashioned B-movies like…

House on Haunted Hill, 1959 Castle Films

This movie centers around a party at a haunted house where the guests must stay the night to win a big cash prize. It features the crown prince of terror, Vincent Price, and some ladies who are very good at screaming. It lives up to the Castle tradition of containing about 14 minutes of plot in it’s 75 minute run-time. But despite the cheesy special effects and some really LOOONG pauses, it’s great fun to watch, especially if you watch one of the many available commentary tracks for this. My favorite is via RiffTrax. And if you think old films are too sacred to poke fun at, I submit this side-splittingly terrible moment.

“Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” I love my new roller skates!

And there are actually some very good thrilling scenes in it, like with the phantom rope. Eating fine brie every day is a bore. Some days I just want the guilty pleasure of some creamy salty American Kraft singles in my movies.

Oct8

Carpe Scream Day 7

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Today I watched Tim Burton’s Corpse Bride.

Tim Burton’s Corpse Bride, 2005 Warner Bros. Pictures

I remember the excitement over this movie coming out in 2005. I think we were all waiting for another enchanting Nightmare Before Christmas with a Victorian grimdark flair. Unfortunately when you set the bar at the top, anything less is just…well lesser.

The movie starts out promisingly, with a strong cast, interesting premise that’s rife with old world mystery and charm and Burton’s famous stark colour palettes of greys and blues. And then somewhere around the middle the story just starts to slow down. Our zany underworld characters are more twee than charming and seem a bit forced in for comic relief, like Cinderella’s mice.

Peter Lorre is SO big with the kids these days.

The Peter Lorre impersonating maggot is to blame for most of it. The kids didn’t get the reference and he didn’t earn more from the adults than a tired eye-roll. The songs start out strong, but sort of peter out as Elfman rather phones in the later numbers.

That being said, it’s still a fun movie. I love watching it with my kids and thrilling to the creepy Emily, laughing at the goofy ghosts. They even get all swoony over Victor and Victoria, which is remarkable in a kids’ film and they got so excited when Christopher Lee (God rest him) showed up.

Now it’s a party, bitches.

When all’s said and done the worst thing that could be said about Corpse Bride is that it’s not Nightmare Before Christmas, and that ain’t bad.